Something Blue

Something old, 
Something new;
Something borrowed, 
And something blue~.


You know. I've been thinking about something. 
I look at television nowadays and there seems to be a "reality" show for just about everything out there. A lot of them can be pretty disturbing, too! But the ones that stick in my mind the most are the ones about marriage. There are women trying to find the perfect dress or the perfect venue, women battling it out for some lofty honeymoon, women torturing their to-be-husbands because they're "bridezillas" and that's supposed to make it okay. they're just stressed, right? Tch... 


I feel like marriage has lost all meaning to a good percentage of the people that want/have it, to be honest. Maybe it has. Television makes me think so. People in general make me think so. Is it really as bad as it looks? I don't want to believe it. The romantic inside of me is screaming no. 

mar·riage/ˈmarij/

Noun:

The formal union of a man and a woman, typically recognized by law, by which they become husband and wife. A relationship between married people or the period for which it lasts.

Alright, so that's the first definition that popped up. Aside from wanting to alter that 'man and woman' bit, that's the gist of the idea, I'd have to agree. But what is marriage? What's its purpose? Somewhere along the way, it seems like it turned into one big pageant or even a cockfight between brides. "Mine's bigger!" Know what I mean? -- And what the fck is with this "bling" crap? -- Don't let me get sidetracked on that. 

What is marriage to you? 

Marriage, to me, is a celebration of love. Let it be between whomever and whatever, I really don't care right now. Anything seems better than the idea of someone putting what should be a down payment on a house into a wedding gown -- then buying a second one for just as much, just so they can have something different on for their smoke-filled, neon-lit gyrate-session of an after party. Adkgnfsoihngf! It irks me so much, yet I can't stop staring at the television when these things come on. I think it's the same effect as a horrid car crash. It's terrifying, but you're consumed by the grotesque imagery, in disbelief and awe. It's not that intense, really, though it's close enough.

I could probably say all of this ten times more eloquently if not for the fact that it's almost 3 a.m...

When I get married, I want it to be small. We'll do the legal work, then we'll find a little spot -- maybe a park or someone's back yard? maybe a little villa with a wide fountain? -- and we'll set up something simple. Some chairs, maybe some flower petals, some candle fixtures... I don't know, the decor honestly won't matter. My dress will be modest, my makeup will be minimal. I'll probably make the invitations with my to-be, by hand or on the computer. Whichever. There'll probably be 10 people there, split evenly between us, give or take a couple.

When it's all done, I'd like to have those ten come back to our place, where I'd probably cook up a nice little dinner. I'd probably get talked into accepting some help, which I wouldn't mind at all. Then we would all sit around the table, the couch, wherever we fit, and talk until our cheeks turned blue. Our guests would go home, and we would finish the evening alone. No phone calls, no internet. Just each other -- and the leftover dishes, haha!

That said, it may not even turn out that way. Maybe my to-be will want something a little bigger. Maybe I'll change my mind about some things. So long as the idea behind it all stays the same, I'll be completely happy. You can be loud, you can proclaim your love from the rooftops and the squares below, but in the end, if you're truly in love, all you'll see is each other, right? That's what's important to me. I want my marriage to be a celebration of our union. Not our wallets, not our achievements. Us. Our love. When I look into my to-be's eyes, I'll see myself there, no thing or no one else -- and they, themselves in mine.  

Sigh~! I miss Steven, haha.

I am totally allowed to think of my boyfriend after something this gushy. Don't look at me like that, damn it!

Welp, I hope you've enjoyed this excursion

just beyond the grey.

I can't wait for next time! 

Blessed be, my friends.

Humbly,                 

Shannon Grey

P.S. Know what spurred this? I totally forgot to mention it in my sleepy little rush. Steven's parents. They're not exactly the cuddly type, but last night, when I went down to ask them something, they were watching television. Holding hands and talking to each other, quietly, their voices disappearing beneath the hum of Auction Wars. Not in a whispering kind of way, but just a gentle, comfortable air had come over them. It was special, you know? Plucked my heart strings, anyway. haha